We Are Ruled by Love

What is harder for you? To forgive someone who has wronged you or to forgive yourself for the wrongdoing that you have done to someone else? What's harder? To forgive someone else who has wronged you or to forgive yourself for your own wrongdoing? There's really no right answer there. I think each person would answer differently because we're all made up differently. We all have different consciences and guilt weighs on us in different ways. We're going to be looking at the different parts of forgiveness. We're going to be looking at a great story of forgiveness that looks at these different aspects, forgiving others and forgiving ourselves. We're going to continue to look at a problematic family, a difficult family, the covenant family. Judah and Joseph and the other brothers, and then Jacob and his sons. We're going to see finally some revolution take place in this family. The message this morning is simple and clear. We are called to find forgiveness and forgive others. We are called to find forgiveness and forgive others. John Stott said this about forgiveness. Forgiveness is as indispensable to the soul as food is for the body. Forgiveness is as indispensable to the soul as food is for the body. We all need forgiveness because we are all sinners. We all need to experience and have forgiveness because we all have guilt. Before we get into the story and look at just really the small speech of Joseph in chapter 45, we'll be ending up in Genesis 45 for the day. I want to retell the story because while I was gone last week and we have some visitors and it's very important to know where we're at in the story. It begins in chapter 37. Joseph gets a fancy coat, but more importantly, he starts having dreams. He has dreams that his brothers and his parents are going to bow down before them. And then it gets worse. He goes around and starts bragging about these dreams. These dreams are going to drive the story. They're going to even drive the brothers themselves to try to kill Joseph as he's coming in his fancy coat. They say, let's do away with this dreamer and see what happens to the dreams. So the tension in the story is about this brother, Joseph. who's going to rule over his brothers and they're fighting against that rule. They sell him into slavery after throwing him in a pit. They decide it's better to make a little profit off of him rather than murdering him. Little do they know that God is at work in all of this. He ends up in Potiphar's house. He rises to the height of power in Potiphar's life until he's then tricked after being seduced by Potiphar's wife. Thrown to prison. So, he rises up in power and then he's thrown back in prison. In prison, he's put in charge of all things again because God blesses him with great wisdom. But then again, he's forgotten by one of the cutbears of Pharaoh. Finally, Pharaoh has some dreams. And the cutbearer remembers Joseph. And Joseph rises to power one more time as the right hand of Pharaoh. Really, the most powerful man in all the world, the most powerful man in the most powerful nation of the world. And there we see a seven years of plenty, where Joseph is going to have great storehouses of all the goods. And then we're going to see seven years of famine. And it's in those seven years of famine that Joseph's brothers have to come to him and depend upon him. And he sets up a program. He wants them to come. He wants them to come and make sure they bring Benjamin, and then he wants to make sure the father's still alive. And Joseph sets this up. He sets it up where Benjamin is found red handed with a stolen cup. And he tells the brothers, look, you can go home in peace and I'm going to keep Benjamin here. And then Judah, the brother who wanted to sell Joseph, he says, no. I will stand in my brother's place. He becomes the Christ figure at this point. I will represent my brother. I will be a substitute for him. And this is what leads to our story this morning. Let's all look to Genesis 45 together. After Judah's very emotional speech where he declares, I will be Benjamin's substitute. We see Joseph's response in chapter 45. Fill in with me there. Then Joseph could not control himself before all those who stood by him. He cried, make everyone go out for me. So no one stayed with him when Joseph made himself known to his brothers. And he wept aloud so the Egyptians heard it. Then the household of Pharaoh heard it. And Joseph said to his brothers, I am Joseph. Is my father still alive? But his brothers could not answer him, for they were dismayed at his presence. So Joseph said to his brothers, come near to me, please. And they came near and he said, I am your brother, Joseph, whom you sold into Egypt. And now do not be distressed or angry with yourselves because you sold me here for God. sent me before you to preserve life. For the famine has been the land these two years, and there are yet five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvest. And God sent me before you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to keep alive for you many survivors. So it is not you who sent me here, but God. He has made me a father to Pharaoh, and Lord of all his house, and ruler over all the land of Egypt. Hurry and go up to my father and say to him, Thus says your son Joseph, God has made me Lord of all Egypt. Come down to me. Do not tarry. You shall dwell in the land of Goshen, and you shall be near me. You and your children, and your children's children, and your flocks, your herds, and all that you have, they will provide for you. For there are yet five years of famine to come, so that you and your household and all that you have do not come to poverty. And now your eyes see. And the eyes of my brother Benjamin see that it is my mouth that speaks to you. You must tell my father of all my honor in Egypt and of all that you have seen. Hurry and bring my father down here." Then he fell upon his brother Benjamin's neck and wept. And Benjamin wept upon his neck, and he kissed all his brothers and wept upon them. After that, his brothers talked with him." Now, there was a very emotional speech of Judah in chapter 44, to be followed only by a more emotional speech by Joseph. Judah, who was willing to give his life for his brother, now Joseph finally reveals his identity. I want to walk through and just point out some of the key aspects, the key phrases here. First, this is the third time he's wept. He's weeping because he's overcome with emotion because his brothers are loving. Judah loves Benjamin. He sees his brothers have changed. The great declaration that at first just has to scare the brothers to death. I am Joseph. I am Joseph. They've been dealing with this bully for some time. Remember how they described him to their father? He's very harsh. He's very mean. He's a very demanding person. He was clean shaven, and so they did not recognize him. But now finally, after years of dealing with this man, they realize who he is. It takes a while for their brains to catch up with all the things going on here. I am Joseph. This is somewhat of an Anakin moment. You know, Anakin Skywalker, when he says, I am your father, there's a revelation. The guy I've been fighting against all this time is this close to Ken. Here he reveals that even though I've been fighting against you, I've been making life difficult for you. I am your brother, Joseph. Now, imagine what's going through their minds here. This is the most powerful man in all the world. He hasn't been nice thus far. He's weeping. But He has the authority to kill us. He has the motive to kill us. This has to be extremely scary and difficult. A range of emotions have to come through. They have to be thinking, what is our Father going to say? What is going to happen when He finds out what really happened? Because they lied about His death. The next words that come out of His mouth. Come near to Me. Come near to me." Now, I think this would heighten the fear. Why does he want us to come near? What does he want to do to us? I kind of wonder, who was the first person to step forward? Now, Judah was probably the closest to him already because he had stepped forward to speak to him in the speech in chapter 44. Is he going to be the one who leads the other brothers up to come near to him? He's closest already and he's now the new leader. Is it Reuben, the oldest, the one who was trying to save his life to begin with? Maybe it's Benjamin, his beloved full brother. What we see here in the coming near, while there may be fear involved in the brother's life, it's an act of compassion. It's an act of love. He wants to draw near to those who have cast him out. They were wanting to move him out of their presence. He is graciously asking them to come near him. Next, the great declaration, I am your brother, Joseph, who you sold into slavery. I am your brother. He claims them as his own. I am your brother. Now, they described him as his son, your other son. But now he says, no, I am your brother. He claims them as his own family. He also confronts their sin. who you sold into slavery. It's very important that he keeps in focus what they have done. It's a very important part of this entire speech that is all about forgiveness and reconciliation, but he doesn't tiptoe over what has really taken place. The sin of the brothers is in the forefront. You sold me into slavery. He also comforts them. Do not be dismayed. He draws them in. in an act of compassion. One of the best parts of this speech is the testimony he gives. Look there and he said, I am your brother Joseph and you sold me to Egypt and now do not be distressed or angry with yourselves because you sold me here for God sent me before you to preserve life. For the famine has been in the land these two years, and there are yet five years in which there will be neither plowing nor harvest. And God sent me here. Look further, so it was not you who sent me here, but God. While his brothers have really been quite evil and nasty in their actions toward Joseph, he sees that they have intentionally done harm to him. They're the ones that sold him into slavery. He's saying, God wasn't out of control at that time. God was directly using your evil for His good. God was intentionally directing what you intended for harm, actually for your own good. This is a mighty and powerful God. You didn't send me here. God sent me here. God has been doing something good beyond what you could possibly imagine. The last observation. from the text is how much he focuses on the father. His very first declaration, I am Joseph, is my father still alive? He wants to be reunited with his father who loved him dearly. He wants him to know that he is still alive and to be able to go to the grave in peace. He begins with that question, is my father still alive? And he ends with that after telling them the theological reason as to why he's there and what he's doing. He goes on and says, please go hurry, tell my father, tell him of the honor, tell him what's happening. Bring him to me. He says, is my father alive? Hurry, go and get him. Then after the speech, he falls on Benjamin's neck and weeps. Benjamin weeps upon his neck. He kisses his brother and weeps upon them. And they talked with him. There's a break there. There's a very intentional break there. They're not weeping with them, I think, because they're just confused. They've just been faced with their greatest sin. They've been faced with a ghost. It's their own brother who could kill them, but is showing them mercy. Our first point this morning as we think about this story is this. We must trust the God who wins us with love. We must trust the God who wins us with love. That dream that Joseph had, that the brother's she's were all going to bow down to him, the brother's stars were all going to bow down to his star. That dream was a promise. You are going to rule your brothers. That promise has been driving this entire story since chapter 37. We saw it partially fulfilled when the brothers all came and unknowingly bowed down to him. But now they're going to bow down and serve him and submit to him as his brothers, not just as servants to Pharaoh. These brothers hated him in chapter 37. They hated that he was a favorite. They hated that he was a chosen one. The murder in their hearts was stopped. just so they can make some money off of them. They intended harm to him. But God and His power, God and His amazing, gracious, loving power, He used it for good. This is why God's ways are above our ways. We can't fathom His holiness. We can't fathom how He works in the midst of our sin to bring about our good. What He determines to do, He will do. That's what it means to be omnipotent. What God wants to do, He will do. I want to do things. I want to run a 4-2-40. I can't do it. I'll never be able to do it. What God wants to do, He will do. He wanted to preserve Israel's life, and He preserves their life even though they were fighting against God's plan. It's amazing that they meet Joseph again. They meet him, they don't recognize him, they're not looking for him, especially not in the court of Pharaoh. They meet him as beggars looking for food in Egypt. Now, let's step back in this story and Joseph has the power to kill these men. Joseph has the authority, the reason, the motivation, the motive to break their stiff necks with an iron fist. He could make them bow down. He could call in the soldiers and throw them down before him. He doesn't do that, though. He could starve them into submission. He could beat them and torture them into submission. He doesn't do that. Instead, he brings them into submission with forgiveness and with love. Why does Joseph, how is he able to do that? How is he able to love them? into submission. Well, Joseph has been walking with God ever since he was sold into slavery. Joseph has been blessed greatly with God. God has shown his grace, his mercy, his love, his patience to Joseph. You see, these brothers are going to submit to Joseph because he's merciful. He's Joseph, the forgiving. He's Joseph, the benevolent. He's Joseph, the servant of God. See, Joseph has seen how God treats his people with love and kindness, and that's how he's going to lead his life. That's how he's going to lead his people. God rules with love and mercy and kindness. God rules his people with grace. And that's the kind of leader Joseph is. He reflects the mysterious rule of God. Now, let's look at some of these passages that refer to this in the New Testament. 1 Corinthians 15, verse 26, speaks of Jesus. He must reign until he has put all things under his feet. Now, this is actually a promise. This is saying, Paul telling us how the original promise in Genesis 3.15 is going to be fulfilled. It's telling us how Psalm 110 is going to be fulfilled. The great hero that God has promised He will reign until all things are put under His feet. That's all people and all power. The power and light of 1 Corinthians 15 is death, but it's also referring to all people. All people will submit to God. All people will be put under submission to Jesus Christ. Another passage is Philippians 2. At the name of Jesus, every knee shall bow. Not every Christian knee. Every knee. At the name of Jesus, every knee shall bow. So all things will be put under His feet in submission to Him, and every knee shall bow to Him. Here's the key question. When and how will your knee bow and submit? When and how will your knee bow to submit? Will you submit to God's righteous rule of love by faith now? Or will you submit to God's righteous rule of wrath by force later? Will you submit to God's righteous rule of love by faith now? Or will you submit to God's righteous rule of wrath by force later? See, when Jesus has come this time, We're coming up on Christmas. We're talking about the time Jesus came 2,000 years ago. He came as God Himself taking upon flesh to give us mercy and grace. He came to preach love. The love of God that covers sins. He came to live a life that we did not live. It's a life without sin. so that He could die for those who sinned, so that all of us sinners could believe in Him, realize that our sin was nailed to that cross. The penalty of our sin, death, was nailed to that cross. And when He rose again, we know that He's conquered the grave, He conquered our sin, and we receive His eternal life. When He comes again, He's coming with judgment. When He comes again, He's coming as a warrior. to destroy his enemies who continue to fight against him. We can believe in the gospel of Jesus Christ now and obey his rule of love, or we can keep fighting and be conquered by the God of love. You see, when we die. We're going to stand before God. He's not going to need a soldier to come and make us bow down to him. When we stand before God with our sinful hearts, our sinful eyes, our sinful hands, our sinful actions, our sinful desires and will. When we stand before God, our hearts are going to testify against us. God's Word is going to testify against us. There's no argument to be made. We'll be speechless. When we stand before a holy God with our sin, there's nothing to be said. We're speechless before Him. We will bow down in pure desire for mercy. But if we have not believed in Jesus Christ, there is no mercy. Our sin is a testimony against ourselves. We will bow down and worship him as the holy God, even as his wrath is poured out against us. We are left speechless as sinners before a holy God. We need someone to talk for us, don't we? If we're speechless in our sin, we need somebody to come in and talk on our behalf. You see, we're saying before the Father in His holiness, and those of us who are believers, the Son comes in. The Son comes and He says, Father, I died for that one. That one has believed in my death and my resurrection. He comes and He says to the Father, forgive him. My life was poured out for Him. My death was for Him. My resurrection is so that He can have new life. You see, when we're speechless in our sin, the Son comes and gives a testimony that His life was given for us. So, we're no longer under judgment. He comes and proclaims good news. Our sin is paid for. Our death is destroyed in Jesus Christ. It's a cosmic courtroom that we're talking about. That will happen when we die or when Christ comes again. I'm thankful that this morning we're going to see a little display of that cosmic courtroom. So we're going to enjoy and celebrate the baptisms of Ethan and Kari. Now, as they've walked in today, we know Ethan as the son of Matthew and Kirsten, and he's a nice, kind gentleman. We know Kari as a loving and sweet young girl. They came in as brothers and sisters to be baptized today, but we're going to hear their public testimony. We're going to hear them praise God for what he's done in their life. We're going to see them go through baptism, the symbol that they are being identified in Christ's death and then his resurrection. See, that gives a picture of what's going to happen in that courtroom, because that public confession, that public symbol, Is this a small token of representation of what's going to take place in that courtroom? Because Jesus is going to say, they're identified with me. They are with me, Father. And the father is going to say, come home, my daughter and my son. So they came in as brothers and sisters in the family, but now after the public confession, we all call them our brothers and sisters. because they are adopted with us in the family of God and Jesus Christ. We must praise God because He doesn't rule us with a rod. God's rule is good for His people. We look at His law. We look at His work. It's good. God rules us with His love and His mercy. Since God rules us with forgiveness, We must find forgiveness. This is our second point. Since God rules us with forgiveness, we must find forgiveness. Again, that's, quote by Stott, forgiveness is as indispensable to the soul as food is to the body. We see great forgiveness in this story. He tells his brothers, Joseph, he tells his brothers, come near to me. The same brothers who sent him away as a slave, he's bringing them near to him. The same brothers who sold him for money, he has given them money and food for sustenance. Joseph was put in great danger, but he is giving them safety. See, Joseph has received great forgiveness from God, and therefore he is giving great forgiveness from God. This reminds us of the parable of Jesus in Matthew 18, the unforgiving servant. A servant owed the king $10,000. The king brings him up, says, Do you have the money? He says, No, I don't have the money. He pleads for patience. He pleads for mercy. And the king says, All right, I'll wipe away the debt. Go about your business. That servant then goes find somebody who owes him $100 and beats him and throws him in prison. The king then goes after that servant who beat and put in prison another man. He says, I showed you great mercy, how do you not go and show this other man great mercy? And the man is more punished than he was to begin with. To the point of that parable is to show us that if we receive great forgiveness, we ought to be giving great forgiveness. It's a sign of a true disciple of Christ. That we forgive one another because we have been forgiven. Joseph also reflects Jesus Christ in this story. He seeks out those who are far off. He seeks out his own enemies. He forgives those who are putting him to death. Now, we look at Joseph and we say, this is fantastic. How does this man have this kind of power to forgive? How does this man, how has he found the ability to forgive these brothers who have been so mean and so nasty? I can tell you this, the power didn't come from within him. The power came from outside of him. The power to forgive like this is only a power that comes from above. When we are born from above in Jesus Christ by the Spirit, We receive this kind of power to forgive. This isn't something that bubbles up from our own hearts. No, that's where envy and jealousy and anger come from. God, he alone gives this kind of power to forgive. Now, it's not all great for Joseph. He begins this by weeping. This is the third time we've seen him weep. Chapter 42, verse 23. After the brothers admit that they killed their brother, they killed Joseph right in front of him, he weeps. In 4330, after he sees Benjamin for the first time, he weeps. Joseph weeps again now. And I think this is a weeping of joy. He's wept in pain. He's wept in celebration. I believe this is weeping in joy. So there's certainly pain here. The mixed emotions that come over him. Here are these brothers who are now loving one another and he's weeping because he sees their love. He's weeping because he wants reconciliation. One of the most important things to focus in here as Joseph weeps is that broken relationships are painful. He's going to be a great forgiver, a great lover of his brothers, but the most important thing to focus here is that broken relationships are painful. Relationships are difficult because we are all sinners. Attaching yourself to another sinner in the way that you're going to be dependent upon them, it's painful. And it's difficult because we're all selfish. Because we all hurt one another, either knowingly or unknowingly. So the most important thing to realize in our relationships is our own sin. That's the most important thing for us to focus on in our own relationships. Not how other people wrong us, but how we wrong others. See, if that's what you focus on, how others wrong you, you become self-righteous and judgmental. But if you always remember, I'm a sinner and I am wronging other people, when they sin against you, you're able to put that into a perspective. The gospel perspective, I hope. Forgiveness, forgiving sins is ugly business. Sin is ugly. When we face sin, it is ugly, but we are called to forgive. I think two of the hardest phrases to say are, please forgive me and I forgive you. These are two of the hardest phrases to say. Please forgive me and I forgive you. Please forgive me is hard because it admits you've done something wrong. I forgive you is hard because it admits someone has hurt you. It also means you have to let go of that bitterness that somehow is always comforting. See, friends, we cannot have real relationships that glorify God if we are not acknowledging our own sin. We must deny our pride and admit our sin if we're going to glorify God. Now, I want to focus on one particular kind of forgiveness for the rest of our time at this point. It's how to forgive yourself. How to forgive yourself. I believe this is a big part of this. Joseph wants to give an explanation to the brothers. Do not be dismayed. God has been good through all of this. He doesn't tiptoe around their sin. He called it out. He confronts it. But he's very clear. You have wronged me. And he's very clear that they need to not be dismayed about it. There's also an issue of how much of the brothers deal to forgive themselves. If he weeps over them, they talk with him. Now, this is better than what they used to do. They were talking about him while he was in a pit. But they're not weeping with him at this point. As we look at what it means to forgive yourself, I do what every great scholar does. I googled it, hoping that a Wikipedia page popped up on what it means to forgive yourself. Sadly, I did not find a Wikipedia page. But I did find some helpful resources, most of which came from Oprah.com. One source gave these steps to forgive yourself. This is how to find freedom from guilt. One, reopen your heart. That's good advice. Don't get trapped in once you get hurt once or once you sin against someone else. Don't be afraid of another relationship. Reopen your heart. That's fine advice. Choose to love yourself. Now, I can appreciate this in the sense that I believe the biblical definition of love is to choose to put your affections on someone. And so, the idea that you choose to love rather than fall in love, I can appreciate that about that step. Demystify your guilt. When we feel guilt, we shouldn't overblow it and make it more than it really is. Okay, I can appreciate that. Give yourself permission to heal. I really don't know what that means. I know I used to get permission to go in the hall at school. I don't know how to get permission to heal. I'm trying to find the best in all of these. Create new relationships. That's helpful. The second source said this. Meditate. All right, if we were going to baptize this, you know, make it Christian, put your thoughts and things above. Okay, we can meditate. We can think about something better. Next step, chant. Now, I just can't help myself but to think of the guy who looks in the mirror and says, I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me. The chanting is just difficult for me to really figure out what that means beyond the SNL skit. Journal, expressing your feelings, that's a good idea. I finally thought I got to it. The next step, the final step that I read, it was called Atonement. from a Jewish rabbi. And as he described it, well, my optimism was destroyed. Serve others to make yourself feel better. Now, there's something that all these steps are missing. We can look at these and we can say these are good steps if in light of the gospel, we're trying to do some of these, but they're all missing the most important thing. They're all doing the most dangerous thing. They're ignoring the sin. None of these are actually looking at the sin for what it is, face to face, and letting that real sin, the real offense of sin, settle in. It's very important. Joseph does not tiptoe around the sin. I'm Joseph, the one you sold into slavery. See, all this one thing in common, they ignore sin. They want you to get past your guilt, not really let it be dealt with. And I know why, because if you don't have Jesus Christ to deal with your guilt, you can only ignore it. Because only God Himself, who declares the great word of forgiveness, can truly deal with your guilt. You have to have a reality that truly says you are forgiven. And the cross of Jesus Christ is the only reality that truly gives forgiveness. The world says, ignore your guilt. Because there's no solution. The Gospel says, be free from your guilt because of Jesus Christ. He died so that we are no longer held accountable for our sins. If you want freedom from guilt, you're not going to get it in doing these practices. You'll get some kind of temporary relief. If you want real freedom from guilt, You take your sin to Jesus Christ and you see the power of the gospel. You see the power of Christ. You see the power of the resurrection. And you know that his word speaks louder than your own sin. Friend, only the Christian gospel truly frees us from guilt. If you're a Christian this morning, if you have bitterness built up and you're longing for that freedom, You can find it by placing your faith in Jesus Christ. He has died for the sins of all who believe in him. He speaks a word to our soul that gives us great comfort. As John Stott said, forgiveness is like food to the soul. It's like fresh water. You're longing for something to quench the bitterness, to give you some relief. It's only the power of God that can do that. Our final point this morning is brief because Ethan and Kari are going to finish it for me. It's simply this, we are to praise God. It's the beautiful declaration that Joseph gives. You didn't do this, God did it. You didn't do this, God has made me. You see, in chapter 37, he went around telling his brothers, hey, I got the dream. You're all going to bow down to me and look at my coat. He was boasting in himself. But here, not just as a mature man, I believe a godly man, he's boasting in God. He's telling them of all the good things God has done to give them comfort, to give them perspective. It's only in light of God's bigger picture that we can ever understand our sin. They could never understand the difficulties of our sin. We need to praise God. We need to boast of Him. Not talk about ourselves. We need to truly declare what God has done and is doing and will do in our lives. He's done such good things. How can we not talk about it? Let's go to the Lord and pray. Our great God who... We praise You, God. You do not leave us alone. You have not left us alone with our hearts that condemn us. You have not left us alone with a heart that weighs us down. You sent Your Son. You sent Your Son so that the wrath that we deserve is in place upon Him. You sent Your Son to rise again so that we have hope. We have life. You give us a Spirit. How sweet His name is, the Comforter. Lord, I pray that Your Spirit would comfort the hearts of all the believers. Help us, Lord, to look at our sin. Help us, Lord, to stare it in its eye and see how gross and offensive it is. And help the Spirit, Lord, illuminate the power of the cross that conquers it. Help us, Lord, to receive great comfort from Your Spirit that declares to us we are forgiven. Help us, Lord, to enjoy the benefits of the peace that You provided for us in Christ. We praise You, our God, because You have spoken a word of forgiveness. Let it overwhelm our hearts. In your Holy Name we pray, Amen.